A Balsam Lake Bachelorette

It's been a crazy marathon of events leading up to Eva's wedding next Friday, and we just checked a big one off last weekend...her bachelorette party! We headed to her family's cabin on Balsam Lake in Wisconsin for a weekend of swimming, sunning, and celebrating one of her last weekends as a single lady, and we got so lucky with gorgeous weather the entire time we were there. 

As soon as we had all our food and liquor for the weekend unpacked, we hit the dock and sunscreened up. I, however, dodged the food-and-beverage cleanup because I gave myself the all-important task of preparing the weekend's second-most important guest. 

This is Laverne. She's a seven-foot inflatable flamingo with a sassy attitude and a penchant for floating. We had WAY too much fun with her all afternoon, and by "we," I might mostly mean me. Total impulse buy when I was having a slightly cranky day and decided nothing would make my summer more basic or happier than jumping on the novelty floatie trend in a big way. 

Our bride-to-be jumped on board right away...

...and we passed plenty of time floating off the dock sipping drinks and chatting (probably way too loudly, sorry neighbors) about all things appropriate for a bachelorette party...that is to say, inappropriate for just about everywhere else. 

Then we hit the boat! 

Eva captained, while I held down the plethora of floaties in the back. 

Selfies abounded. 

Sun was soaked up, and all too soon we were feeling a little too toasted and headed back for the dinner-and-lingerie portion of the evening. While Eva prepped the burgers for the grill, the bridesmaids did a little decorating. 

Tee hee! We played the cliched-but-oh-so-fun game of "guess who brought what lingerie, if the bride guesses right the giver drinks, if she's wrong she drinks." Eva did terribly at first, which was hilarious, and eventually caught on right in time to make us all giddy and tipsy. 

Post-dinner, we debated staying in and instead decided to get our bachelorette out on the town. By "out on the town," we mean "deep in a townie bar," and in Balsam Lake, that means Blacksmith Shop.

We rolled in around 8pm with Eva in her veil, and immediately became THE hot entertainment of the night. I think it became a game to see who could help us check what off our bachelorette list...

...starting off with "Spin the Shot." Eva ended up with some kind of Midori and blue curacao shot, while the rest of us ordered rounds of vodka Red Bulls and gin and tonics before heading out back. What's out back, you may ask? 

Why yes, as a matter of fact, the evening's feature was a mechanical bull. Which we shamelessly made Eva ride, multiple times, while the live band was warming up. Other items checked off our list: 

Take a selfie in the men's room, which was hilariously labeled "Outboards" (women's was "Inboards," ha!). We played dumb when the bartender came to pull us out, and acted like we didn't know what an outboard motor was...which...riiiiight. 

We took blow job shots, some more successfully than others (in life as in shots hahaha). 

We did shots with the bull operator. 

And Claire went home with the classiest and most innovative headwear I've seen in a long time, a nice Bud Light cowboy hat! 

After dancing our faces off to the country band that didn't know any Zac Brown, we cranked up "Chicken Fried" and headed home to play a classic bachelorette staple: 

HI BLAKE. (We named him, along with the guy on the reverse, Antonio.) Hilarity ensued. After a little more chatting and a lot of chugging water, we passed out for the night and slept through some pretty intense thunderstorms. 

Sunday morning's breakfast was exactly what the doctor ordered...tons of fruit and two breakfast bakes soaked up any residual alcohol in our systems. A successful bachelorette for sure! Next stop, #sandersons4eva in just NINE days!